


Lost Songs

by AriDesert



Series: The Three Evils [4]
Category: jacksepticeye
Genre: Angst, JJ is Not Okay, Maybe - Freeform, The Beatles music, Whump, slight self harm, sweet dream turned nightmare
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-10-18 00:42:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17571020
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AriDesert/pseuds/AriDesert
Summary: JJ wakes up from a nightmare and his new reality starts to sink in





	Lost Songs

There was music playing softly, drawing JJ away from his drawing desk. The farther he walked, the louder the music became. Slowly, he recognized the beginning of one of his favorite songs of this time. 

_ Hey Jude, don’t make sad.  _

_ Take a sad song, and make it better _

_ Remember, to let her into your heart _

_ Then you can start to make it better. _

JJ smiled and began to sing the next line, “Hey Jude, don’t be afraid, you were made to go out and get her. The minute you let her under your skin, then you begin to make it better.” 

Feeling strangely energetic, JJ burst out into hearty laughter and danced around, shouting the lyrics to the songs that played. 

_ 1,2,3,4 Can I have a little more? 5,6,7,8 9 10 I love you!  _

_ A, B, C D, Can I bring my friend to tea? E, F, G H I J I love you! _

JJ spun with the beat, “Sail the ship! Bum, bum-bum! Chop the tree! Bum bum-bum!  Skip the rope! Bum bum-bum! Look at me! All together now!”

_ All together now! All together now! _

 

Yellow Submarine was playing from somewhere in the open landscape when JJ fell into a canyon that had suddenly appeared under his feet. Feeling weightless, it took JJ a few seconds to realize that his fall wasn’t going to end with him simply landing on his feet. 

His mind went blank in terror, his arms and legs uselessly flailing. Somewhere in the back of his mind, JJ registered that the music was still playing, still in the middle of Yellow Submarine. 

There was the bottom of the canyon, racing up to meet JJ and help him stop his fall. JJ knew there was nothing he could do to avoid the end. He knew that, but still he struggled to the last moment, desperately trying to stay alive. The last second before JJ hit the bottom, piercing giggles rang out, distorted and shrill.

 

Gasping, JJ bolted up in bed, mouth open in a silent scream. He grasped around wildly for something, anything that would keep him safe on the ground. As his heartbeat slowed, JJ remembered the first part of his dream. 

He knew what had caused it. He had fallen asleep right after his brothers had watched the Beatles Yellow Submarine. The sound of the songs from the movie must have filtered into JJ’s subconscious while he slept. 

A deep pit opened in his chest when he realized that he wouldn’t be able to sing anymore. Despair flooded into that pit, nearly drowning JJ. He had sung to make himself feel better, he had sung to Chase’s children when they visited, he had sung to cheer up his brothers, he had sung for enjoyment. Now, with what had happened, he would never be able to sing again. 

He’d never be able to sing when his emotions were getting too much to handle. He’d never be able to sing and entertain the children again. He’d never be able to use his voice to help cheer his brothers up. 

**_He’d never be able to sing again._ **

Tears streamed down JJ’s face as all those realizations hit him at once. He brought his knees up to his chest, sobbing even harder because he heard  _ nothing. _ He couldn’t make any noise louder than his heavy breathing. 

Frustrated by everything, JJ threw his head back into the wall.  _ It hurts. Everything hurts. _

He bowed his head again only to slam his elbows into the wall instead. Over, and over, and over he slammed his elbows into the wall, not caring if he hurt himself even more or if he broke the wall. 

Eventually Jackie came running in, a panicked look on his face. By then JJ had stopped pounding the wall, but there were small reddish smears on the wall and JJ was slumped down, staring vacantly at nothing. Jackie left for a moment and came back with a bowl of gently steaming water and some bandages. 

Carefully, Jackie knelt next to JJ’s bed and started cleaning the new wounds. After he was finished with that, Jackie sat on the bed and pulled JJ into a hug. He didn’t say anything, JJ probably would have pushed him away if he had, he just sat there and gently rocked back and forth while JJ clung to him and cried himself back to sleep.


End file.
